June Lockhart is 100 years old today. And, yep, she's still with us!
A personal favorite of mine, she was in the 1938 version of A Christmas Carol, 1944's classic Judy Garland musical Meet Me in St. Louis, played Timmy's mom on Lassie ...
And here's a little known fact — the Allman Brothers, when they were known as the Hour Glass, were the house band at June Lockhart's wild parties in the 1960s!
Katherine and I saw her on stage at the Kennedy Center in Steel Magnolias, 35+ years ago.
But for me, I'll always love her best as Dr. Maureen Robinson on television's Lost in Space. Week-in and week-out, she lived a marginal existence on the raggedy end of the final frontier, cooking dinner, folding space laundry, and fretting on cue as her precocious son Will, the troublesome stowaway Dr. Smith, and a wisecracking Robot stole the show out from under her. All without a discouraging word.
One of the few episodes that featured her was "One of Our Dogs is Missing." Although set in 1997, the show usually ignored the fact that Betty Friedan was already a household name by 1965, but here June Lockhart got to show off her acting chops when Maureen is left in charge of the ship while the men are away. Threats abound and she handles them all with brains, bravery and quiet resolve.
Some day I'm going to write a 3000 word essay about the phenomenon known as the Hallmark Christmas movie, but not today.
The dog has been under the weather lately which means a lot of couch time for me and her. But what to watch while glued to the television? I've seen every rerun of every Law & Order there ever was or will be, and the Star Trek Channel (a.k.a. BBC-America) has worn me out. So flipping channels, I stumbled across the two Hallmark cable channels — Hallmark and Hallmark Movies & Mysteries — which show nothing but Christmas movies 24/7 from the week before Halloween through New Year's Day.
And not just any Christmas movies, but movies made by Hallmark for Hallmark. This year alone, Hallmark will wind up debuting thirty-three new movies.
So far, I've seen 24 of them.
Jeebus, do they turn them out on a lathe? As a writer and amateur movie historian, I had to figure this out.
After extensive research (passive bingeing), I can report that all of them can be distilled down to a single storyline: a damaged soul is made whole again through the redemptive power of Christmas and heterosexual pair-bonding.
There are lots of pretty young widows, single moms, career women, angels longing to be made flesh, soldiers returning home, children hoping for a second parent, burned-out writers in need of a Christmas goose and shop owners looking to sell out or stay put. Long lost loves meet again through a series of coincidences that would make Charles Dickens blush.
Santa Claus — the real one — shows up about one time in three, mostly to act as a matchmaker, but sometimes just to remind people that decorating an artificial tree can make all the difference.
Our heroine typically battles one of three great villains: cynicism, death and/or corporate capitalism, the latter a pretty interesting choice considering the source.
Spoiler alert: she will win with minimal fuss.
In the course of two hours, minus commercials, two good-looking B-listers will fall in love, kiss around the 1:58 mark and take that job or move to that small town that once seemed too quaint for words but turns out to be just perfect.
The movies star the likes of Mira Sorvino, Lindy Booth, Rachel Boston, Catherine Bell, Maggie Lawson and very occasionally a male lead as well-known as Dermot Mulroney.
Supporting work from everybody: Judd Nelson, Danny Glover, Joan Cusack, Shelley Long, Beau Bridges, James Brolin, Jewel Staite, Giselle Eisenberg, and on and on.
These movies are not in any sense great — there are no memorable lines or scenes or images or performances, and none of the emotions they tap into will resonate beyond the closing credits. In fact, they are so cookie-cutter, I image there's a template (or three) and the writers simply fill in new character names and a bit of explanatory dialogue and bang, done.
There's even one called A Cookie Cutter Christmas — how on-point can you get!
But like macaroni and cheese out of a box — or should I say sugar-frosted Christmas cookies hot out of the oven — predictable can be terribly comforting. Especially in terrible times.
Recommended, if you're in the right frame of mind.
While I'm a forgiving critic, I don't think I'm prone to hyperbole. So when I tell you that I think The Good Place might be the most ambitious comedy ever made for network television, I'm not one of those idiots who hail the latest as the greatest simply because I haven't seen anything made before yesterday afternoon.
All thirteen episodes of The Good Place are available for streaming at NBC.com, on demand or, I think, Hulu (I'm old — I don't get Netflix or Hulu or any of those streaming platforms).
1) Best movie of 2016
I liked Hell or High Water and Love & Friendship. Haven't seen Manchester by the Sea yet, for which I have high hopes.
2) Worst movie of 2016
There were, according to imdb.com, 12,414 movies released in 2016. I haven't seen enough of them to have any idea what might be the worst.
3) Best actress of 2016
I thought Kate Beckinsale should have gotten more notice for Love & Friendship.
4) Best actor of 2016
Jeff Bridges got the nominations for Hell or High Water but Chris Pine did the heavy lifting. Heard good things about Casey Affleck in Manchester by the Sea.
5) What movie from 2016 would you prefer not hearing another word about? Why?
Since blogspot ate all my movie links in October and we dropped our subscription to New Yorker before that, I haven't heard or read much about anything movie-related. Have people been talking about movies?
6) Second-favorite Olivier Assayas movie
You flatter me by assuming I know who Olivier Assayas is.
7) Miriam Hopkins or Kay Francis?
Miriam Hopkins, although Kay Francis got the better of her when they squared off in Trouble in Paradise. Favorite Miriam Hopkins performance? Design for Living followed by Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931). I wrote about the latter here. Dig her in Lubitsch's The Smiling Lieutenant, too.
8) What’s the story of your first R-rated movie?
A bunch of misfits join a college fraternity. Hi-jinks ensue. Although that's probably not what you meant. I want to say my first R-rated movie was Animal House, but I can't swear to it. Anyway, I saw it with a pal and his father. No sneaking around, no shy tittering behind raised hands, just three people watching a very funny movie.
9) What movie from any era that you haven’t yet seen would you be willing to resolve to see before this day next year?
I'm not committing myself to anything.
10) Second-favorite Pedro Almodovar movie
I don't know. Volver?
11) What movie do you think comes closest to summing up or otherwise addressing the qualities of 2016?
Apparently they never made a movie of It Can't Happen Here, so maybe A Face in the Crowd?
12) Chris Pine or Chris Pratt?
Like them both. If I were casting the movie running in my head, I'd cast Chris Pratt if I wanted to emphasize the comedic elements of the story, Chris Pine the dramatic.
13) Your favorite movie theater, presently or from the past
AFI-Silver in Silver Spring, Maryland, particularly theater one.
14) Favorite movie involving a family celebration Hannah and Her Sisters revolved around a series of family celebrations (rather than celebrations of family). That might be the best. Still, the most under-rated is The Ref, starring Denis Leary as a thief who takes Judy Davis, Kevin Spacey and their family hostage at Christmas time. O.Henry style hilarity ensues. If you broke into my house and forced me to watch one of the two, I'd watch The Ref.
15) Second-favorite Paul Schrader movie Taxi Driver, I suppose, although I don't like it nearly as much as most others do.
16) Ruth Negga or Hayley Atwell?
Hayley Atwell. I thought the first season of TV's Agent Carter was terrific.
17) Last three movies you saw, in any format La La Land at the theater. Pleasantly meh. The Maltese Falcon on DVD. Classic. The Thin Man streaming. Classic.
18) Your first X-rated, or porn movie?
It's been so long since I've seen a porn movie, Ronald Reagan was president and porn stars had pubic hair!
19) Richard Boone or Charles McGraw?
Is this a trick question? Richard Boone.
20) Second-favorite Chan-wook Park movie
Ate a bagel in Bryant Park last time I was in New York, does that count?
21) Movie that best encompasses or expresses loneliness The Apartment is probably my favorite. The "Over The Rainbow" sequence of The Wizard of Oz may be my favorite scene on the subject.
22) What’s your favorite movie to watch with your best friend?
Well, my best friend is Katie-Bar-The-Door. I'd say my favorite movie to watch with her is whichever one we're watching together.
23) Who’s the current actor you most look forward to seeing in 2017?
Looking forward to seeing Kristen Bell in the season (and probably series) finale of The Good Place tomorrow night.
24) Your New Year’s wish for the movies
That Katie-Bar-The-Door and I actually make it to the movies with our pals from time to time.
The Grinder, The Crazy Ones, Almost Human, Bunheads, not to mention Firefly — Katie-Bar-The-Door and I have a gift for falling in love with television shows the rest of the world doesn't. I have this deep abiding fear that NBC's brilliant (brilliantly nuts!) comedy The Good Place is so very, very good it, too, will join the list.
If you love me, don't let that happen.
The gist of the series? Kristen Bell (star of Veronica Mars, that Disney movie and a bunch of ads on television) is dead and, thank heaven, she's gone to the good place. Except, oops, heaven made a mistake and she most certainly doesn't belong there. Got to keep fooling the amiable dunce (Ted Danson) who runs the place.
Helping her pull off the deception is the guy who's supposed to be her soul mate (but, of course, isn't) (a terrific William Jackson Harper).
It sounds like the set-up for a tedious one-note joke, but it isn't. Each episode goes to an unexpected place, creating an ever-deepening mystery, while exploring the concept of what it means to be good and why being bad is often so much more interesting. The writing is sharp and witty, and the acting is pitch-perfect. Genius.
It airs on NBC, Thursday nights at 8:30 (Eastern). Tomorrow evening (Saturday), NBC will be running a Good Place mini-marathon to give you another chance to catch up. I highly (highly!) recommend that you seize the opportunity.
It's been a hard year for Katie and me — don't make us suffer another tragedy. Watch The Good Place. Watch it now!
Bill Mumy just tweeted that today is the 51st anniversary of the premiere of Lost in Space. So it is! I wrote a four part essay about the series last year at this time. Here's a short piece of it:
THE ORIGIN STORY "MINISERIES"
Not really a miniseries, of course, but interconnected chapters of one storyline, these five episodes take us from the initial liftoff through the family's first few months on an uncharted planet. Along the way, you'll discover how the Robinsons got lost in the first place, how they reacted to their first close encounter with an alien species, and how the show's best known characters, the villainous Dr. Smith and his odd-couple sidekick, the Robot, came to be on board. Featuring all the best set pieces from the unaired pilot, if you're new to the series or just looking to skim the cream off the top, this is a good place to start. The Reluctant Stowaway The Derelict Island in the Sky There Were Giants in the Earth The Hungry Sea
BEST EPISODE OF SEASON ONE
My Friend, Mr. Nobody — A rare episode that centers on Penny (Angela Cartwright), this is a poignant fairy tale about a lonely little girl and her not-so-imaginary imaginary friend. The sort of thing Rod Serling and The Twilight Zone excelled at.
MOST TYPICAL EPISODE OF SEASON ONE
Wish Upon a Star — Filled with the first season's signature elements, this is a top-notch morality tale about the dangers of getting everything you want, featuring wonderfully weird expressionistic cinematography, unexplained alien artifacts, the harsh reality of frontier living and Dr. Smith's self-absorbed jack-ass-ery.
WORST EPISODE OF SEASON ONE
The Space Croppers — A family of shiftless space hillbillies (led by Oscar-winner Mercedes McCambridge) cultivate a carnivorous crop that threatens to devour the Robinsons. This was the series' first full-blown foray into WTF. It wouldn't be the last.
BEST EPISODE OF SEASON TWO
The Prisoners of Space — In this, the best episode of the worst season, a menagerie of alien creatures put the Robinsons on trial for violating the laws of outer space. Kafka with monsters. (Note: You might also check out "The Wreck of the Robot" — MM.)
MOST TYPICAL EPISODE OF SEASON TWO
Revolt of the Androids — A couple of androids drop in on the Robinsons, Dr. Smith hatches a get-rich-quick scheme, and human sentimentality wins the day. This one did at least spawn the catchphrase "Crush! Kill! Destroy!"
WORST EPISODE OF SEASON TWO
The Questing Beast — So many to choose from, among them "The Space Vikings", "Mutiny in Space", "Curse of Cousin Smith", etc. Here, Penny befriends a papier-mâché dragon that is being hunted by a bumbling knight in King Arthur's armor. How can something so campy be so boring?
BEST EPISODE OF SEASON THREE
The Anti-Matter Man — An experiment gone wrong transports Professor Robinson into a parallel dimension where he meets his own evil self. The scenery is summer stock by way of Dr. Caligari, and Guy Williams, having the most fun as an actor since Zorro, gets to chew on all of it. Great stuff, and for those philistines among you who won't touch black-and-white, the best of the color episodes.
MOST TYPICAL EPISODE OF SEASON THREE
Visit to a Hostile Planet — Season three was wildly uneven, but at least it was trying, leavening genuine science fiction with campy comedy. Here, the Robinsons finally make it back to Earth only to discover it's 1947 and everyone thinks they're hostile, alien invaders. A cross between Star Trek and Dad's Army. Good stuff.
WORST EPISODE OF SEASON THREE
The Great Vegetable Rebellion — Featuring a giant talking carrot played by Stanley Adams (Cyrano Jones of Star Trek's "The Trouble with Tribbles"), this is, in the words of Bill Mumy, "probably the worst television show in primetime ever made." So bad, it's good, this is gloriously awful must-see tv.
BEST GUY WILLIAMS (PROF. ROBINSON) EPISODE
Follow the Leader — The spirit of a dead alien warrior possesses Professor Robinson and turns this warm, rational man into a vicious, unpredictable bastard. Dark, moody, occasionally terrifying, pop-culture critic John Kenneth Muir called this episode a parable of "alcoholism in the nuclear family." One of the series' very best.
BEST JUNE LOCKHART (MAUREEN) EPISODE
One of Our Dogs Is Missing — Although set in 1997, the show usually ignored the fact that Betty Friedan was already a household name by 1965, but here June Lockhart gets to show her chops when Maureen is left in charge of the ship while the men are away. Threats abound and she handles them all with brains, bravery and quiet resolve.
BEST MARK GODDARD (MAJOR WEST) EPISODE
Condemned of Space — I've already mentioned "The Hungry Sea" and "The Anti-Matter Man", so I'll go with this one where the Robinsons are captured by a prison spaceship and Major West winds up hanging by his thumbs on an electronic rack. Admittedly, he had more lines in "The Space Primevals" and "Fugitives in Space", but both of those episodes suck. With Marcel Hillaire as a charming murderer who strangles his victims with a string of pearls.
BEST MARTA KRISTEN (JUDY) EPISODE
Attack of the Monster Plants — As daughter Judy, Marta Kristen rarely got a chance to shine but here she showed off a saucy bite as her own evil doppelgänger. Like much of season one, there's a dream-like quality to the mood and cinematography that papers over some of the episode's nuttier flights of fancy.
BEST BILL MUMY (WILL) EPISODE
A Change of Space — As the series' true hero, there are a lot of Will-centered episodes to choose from — "Return from Outer Space", "The Challenge", "Space Creature", among others — but I'll go with this one in which Will takes a ride in an alien space ship and winds up with the most brilliant mind in the galaxy. And still his father doesn't take him seriously! This is one of those episodes that underscores my contention that not all of the trouble Will found himself in was of Dr. Smith's making. (Note: If I were writing this today, I'd probably go with "Return from Outer Space," but this is a valid choice, too — MM)
BEST ANGELA CARTWRIGHT (PENNY) EPISODE
The Magic Mirror — Well, the second best, and like the previously-mentioned "My Friend, Mr. Nobody", this is a poignant fairy tale about coming of age on the final frontier. Here, Penny falls through a magic mirror into a dimension with a population of one — a boy (Michael J. Pollard) who promises she'll never have to grow up. Beautiful and bittersweet.
BEST JONATHAN HARRIS (DR. SMITH) EPISODE
Time Merchant — Let's be honest, from best to worst, they were all Dr. Smith episodes. Originally, I planned to pick the episode where Smith isn't a colossal dick, but it turns out there isn't one, so instead I went with this one, an inventive and visually-Daliesque time travel story that poses the question, "What if Smith hadn't been on the show in the first place?"
BEST ROBOT EPISODE
War of the Robots — The first episode where the Robot crosses over from a mere machine, no matter how clever, into a fully-conscious Turing-Test artificial intelligence. Featuring Forbidden Planet's Robby the Robot. If Will was the show's hero, and Smith its plot-driving irritant, the Robot was its soul. See also "The Ghost Planet", "The Wreck of the Robot", "Trip Through the Robot", "The Mechanical Men", "Flight into the Future", "Deadliest of the Species", "Junkyard in Space".
BEST GUEST STAR
The Challenge — A lot to choose from — among those I haven't mentioned, Warren Oates, Werner Klemperer, Kym Karath, Strother Martin, Wally Cox, Francine York, John Carradine, Daniel J. Travanty, Lyle Waggoner, Edy Williams, Arte Johnson — but I'm going with Kurt Russell who plays a young prince from a warrior planet trying to prove to his father (Michael Ansara) that he's worthy of his trust, respect and love. A good story about father-son relationships, plus Guy Williams gets to show off the fencing skills that earned him the title role as Disney's Zorro.
BEST ALIENS
Invaders from the Fifth Dimension — The cyclops ("There Were Giants in the Earth") is the most iconic, the "bubble creatures" ("The Derelict") the most outré, but I'm going with the mouthless, disembodied heads from this one. Stranded while visiting from another dimension, they need a brain to replace a burned-out computer component and notice Will has a pretty good head on his shoulders. So they task Dr. Smith with bringing it to them on a metaphorical plate. The show would recycle this plotline over and over but the first time out of the box, it feels fresh. Plus their spaceship is cooler than anything Star Trek ever served up.
BEST OF THE REST
The Keeper, Parts One and Two — The only two-parter during the show's run, this one stars Michael Rennie (The Day the Earth Stood Still) as an intergalactic zookeeper looking for two new specimens for his exhibit — Will and Penny! Coming at the midpoint of season one, this was the high watermark of the show's original (serious) concept of a family struggling to survive in a hostile environment. After this, the camp crept in with mixed results.
Named for Katie-Bar-The-Door, the Katies are "alternate Oscars"—who should have been nominated, who should have won—but really they're just an excuse to write a history of the movies from the Silent Era to the present day.
To see a list of nominees and winners by decade, as well as links to my essays about them, click the highlighted links:
Remember: There are no wrong answers, only movies you haven't seen yet.
The Silent Oscars
And don't forget to check out the Silent Oscars—my year-by-year choices for best picture, director and all four acting categories for the pre-Oscar years, 1902-1927.
Look at me—Joe College, with a touch of arthritis. Are my eyes really brown? Uh, no, they're green. Would we have the nerve to dive into the icy water and save a person from drowning? That's a key question. I, of course, can't swim, so I never have to face it. Say, haven't you anything better to do than to keep popping in here early every morning and asking a lot of fool questions?
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